#6
It’s been awhile since I’ve written anything. A lot of times I write on paper first and then transfer it to my blog, but I have nothing written down. Lately I’ve been depressed, confused, and frustrated. A lot of things have been happening in my life that make my heart twist and turn painfully inside my chest.
One of the bigger things I have been troubled over is the whole idea of dating. My view of dating has changed dramatically since my high school years. Back then dating, for me, was the belief that I can get a girl to like me if I was nice to her and bought her stuff all the while hoping for some kind of reward (usually in the form of physical contact). Sounds familiar with the idea of prostitution, doesn’t it? My high school days, and even my first semester of college, were full of dead end, physical, self-centered relationships. The were sinful and rebellious against God.
These days, through much counsel and dwelling in God’s light, my view has really changed to a more realistic, God-centered idea of dating, or Christian dating, if you will. Mark Driscoll says that the ultimate goal of Christian dating is marriage, the unity of one man and one woman as a symbol of God’s unity with the church (Ephesians 5:25-27). The idea is that a man will “pursue” a woman, and he will learn about her heart and soul for God–an attractive, godly woman is more attractive in her fear of God (Proverbs 31:30)–with the goal of marriage in mind. Now this is not to say that because a man decides to pursue a woman they are guaranteed marriage. I have a friend who was engaged to another woman when he met his current wife. He ended the relationship with his fiance and pursued this other godly woman and they ended up getting married after only a month of dating. Needless to say, there is no “the one” when it comes to Christian dating. There’s only the one you marry.
Lately, I’ve grown really attracted to a friend of mine. She is a beautiful, godly girl who strives to seek Christ in all of her circumstances. Here’s the problem: I’m a coward. In order to pursue a girl, I must be bold. I need to find my strength in God and trust that his sovereign will takes hold. My pursuit of God needs to be first and foremost. There is no escaping God’s will. So my faith should rest in that. I must have patience and peace.
It’s so hard.
My God will help me.
